Lesson Two

It is what it is not.

Whilst puzzling over a inept painting in a East End London gallery a young friend pointed out that, what was significant, was what the painting was trying not to be, trying not to do. That is, what the artist was avoiding, what it wasn’t.

My problem was that I could not see whether this painting was intentionally bad, a pastiche, bricolage, ironically mischievous, wittily childish, a joke, knowingly gauche, or that it was simply the best they could do. If this was a deconstruction then should it be more ludicrous than it needed to be?

Was it a celebration and reference to the amateur or genuinely amateurish?

Was this artist breaking the rules or did not know them in the first place?

How could I tell?

Does it matter? Why should it matter?

Art History, if regarded as the progression of styles and forms, can be seen as a continuous set of reactions against previous forms. A new generation breaking with past practice and ejecting older methodologies, the archetypal Oedipal struggle for supremacy. All good stuff, but in this directionless pluralist swamp we find ourselves in, it is often difficult to discern these differences. Pluralism offers the opportunity to do different things but not the ideology to discriminate.

So, this painting is defined by what it is not, shunning what is say, obvious and predictable, or leaving out what it is against. This could simply mean doing the wrong thing, being perverse, but here the act of avoidance is the important thing. It’s not what you do but what you don’t do, that has significance.

So, the important thing about the painting was what has been left out, that is, what it is not.

It is what it is not.

 

I have drawn up suggestions in the form of titles or intentions of some of the different things a painting might try not to be. You might like to have a go at some of these exercises. However, note that a fashionable knowingness is also required here.

Good luck.

 

A painting trying not to be good.

A painting trying not to be aesthetic.

A painting trying not to be academic.

A painting trying not to be traditional.

A painting trying not to be beautiful.

A painting trying not to be pretty.

A painting trying not to be respectable.

A painting trying not to be avant-garde.

A painting trying not to be pretentious.

A painting trying not to be obvious.

A painting trying not to be expensive.

A painting trying not to be a masterpiece.

A painting trying not to be a potboiler.

A painting trying not to be modern.

A painting trying not to be critical.

A painting trying not to be radical.

A painting trying not to be earnest.

A painting trying not to be private.

A painting trying not to be ethical.

A painting trying not to be stolen.

A painting trying not to be too big.

A painting trying not to be a copy.

A painting trying not to be influenced.

A painting trying not to be childish.

A painting trying not to be the same.

A painting trying not to be different.

A painting trying not to be compromised.

A painting trying not to be cynical.

A painting trying not to be didactic.

A painting trying not to be strategic.

A painting trying not to be ironic.

A painting trying not to be conventional.

A painting trying not to be contemporary.

A painting trying not to be sensational.

A painting trying not to be safe.

A painting trying not to be easy.

A painting trying not to be a struggle.

A painting trying not to be passionate.

A painting trying not to be over worked.

A painting trying not to be intuitive.

A painting trying not to be abstract.

A painting trying not to be ambiguous.

A painting trying not to be compromised.

A painting trying not to be average.

A painting trying not to be ethical.

A painting trying not to be radical.

A painting trying not to be symbolic.

A painting trying not to be emblematic.

A painting trying not to be heraldic.

A painting trying not to be a talisman.

A painting trying not to be iconoclastic.

A painting trying not to be contemplative

A painting trying not to be familiar.

A painting trying not to be dangerous.

A painting trying not to be courageous.

A painting trying not to be retrospective

A painting trying not to be historical.

A painting trying not to be a statement.

A painting trying not to be referential.

A painting trying not to be real.

A painting trying not to be small.

A painting trying not to be a double take.

A painting trying not to be a pastiche.

A painting trying not to be messy.

A painting trying not to be an equivalent.

A painting trying not to be a fraud.

A painting trying not to be comparative.

A painting trying not to be inspired.

A painting trying not to be inaccurate.

A painting trying not to be insipid.

A painting trying not to be correct.

A painting trying not to be politically correct.

A painting trying not to be wrong.

A painting trying not to be inept.

A painting trying not to be challenging.

A painting trying not to be paradoxical.

A painting trying not to be fashionable.

A painting trying not to be a parody.

A painting trying not to be relevant.

A painting trying not to be inventive.

A painting trying not to be puerile.

A painting trying not to be spacial.

A painting trying not to be colourful.

A painting trying not to be a game.

A painting trying not to be kitsch.

A painting trying not to be rude.

A painting trying not to be nice.

A painting trying not to be trivial.

A painting trying not to be profound.

A painting trying not to be ominous.

A painting trying not to be disquieting.

A painting trying not to be reflective.

A painting trying not to be critical.

A painting trying not to be optimistic.

A painting trying not to be nihilistic.

A painting trying not to be an analogy.

A painting trying not to be metaphorical.

A painting trying not to be offensive.

A painting trying not to be anarchistic.

A painting trying not to be conservative.

A painting trying not to be simple.

A painting trying not to be complex.

A painting trying not to be the same.

A painting trying not to be botched.

A painting trying not to be amateur.

A painting trying not to be skilled.

A painting trying not to be professional.

A painting trying not to be articulate.

A painting trying not to be a cliché.

A painting trying not to be original.

A painting trying not to be predictable.

A painting trying not to be unpredictable.

A painting trying not to be memorable.

A painting trying not to be famous.

A painting trying not to be cleaver.

A painting trying not to be dramatic.

A painting trying not to be gestural.

A painting trying not to be magical.

A painting trying not to be pornographic.

A painting trying not to be iconic.

A painting trying not to be a fetish.

A painting trying not to be spiritual.

A painting trying not to be meditative.

A painting trying not to be satirical.

A painting trying not to be novel.

A painting trying not to be skilled.

A painting trying not to be propaganda.

A painting trying not to be realist.

A painting trying not to be figurative.

A painting trying not to be gauche.

A painting trying not to be lyrical.

A painting trying not to be pleasing.

A painting trying not to be disquieting.

A painting trying not to be didactic.

A painting trying not to be cognitive.

A painting trying not to be genius.

A painting trying not to be stupid.

A painting trying not to be shamanic.

A painting trying not to be symmetrical.

A painting trying not to be lob-sided.

A painting trying not to be defined.

A painting trying not to be identical.

A painting trying not to be characterized.

A painting trying not to be creative.

A painting trying not to be ludicrous.

A painting trying not to be broad.

A painting trying not to be ambivalent.

A painting trying not to be sexy.

A painting trying not to be ambitious.

A painting trying not to be referential.

A painting trying not to be aspirational.

A painting trying not to be absurd.

A painting trying not to be problematic.

A painting trying not to be partisan.

A painting trying not to be contentious.

A painting trying not to be orthodox.

A painting trying not to be contradictory.

A painting trying not to be gay.

A painting trying not to be macho.

A painting trying not to be scholarly.

A painting trying not to be self-referential.

A painting trying not to be a daub.

A painting trying not to be measured.

A painting trying not to be modest.

A painting trying not to be fresh.

A painting trying not to be a betrayal.

A painting trying not to be visionary.

A painting trying not to be autobiographical.

A painting trying not to be a self portrait.

A painting trying not to be primitive.

A painting trying not to be direct.

A painting trying not to be tepid.

A painting trying not to be physical.

A painting trying not to be lovely.

A painting trying not to be neat.

A painting trying not to be polite.

A painting trying not to be shocking.

A painting trying not to be a totem.

A painting trying not to be taboo.

A painting trying not to be revolutionary.

A painting trying not to be all over.

A painting trying not to be theatrical.

A painting trying not to be illustrative.

A painting trying not to be narrative.

A painting trying not to be formal.

A painting trying not to be balanced.

A painting trying not to be minimal.

A painting trying not to be grotesque.

A painting trying not to be in your face.

A painting trying not to be supernatural.

A painting trying not to be fiction.

A painting trying not to be tactical.

A painting trying not to be finished.

A painting trying not to be fashionable.

A painting trying not to be cheap.

A painting trying not to be extravagant.

A painting trying not to be moral.

A painting trying not to be thoughtful.

A painting trying not to be authentic.

A painting trying not to be personal.

A painting trying not to be public.

A painting trying not to be in-between.

A painting trying not to be a figment.

A painting trying not to be purely visual.

A painting trying not to be daft.

A painting trying not to be cutting edge.

A painting trying not to be an excuse for painting.

A painting trying not to be just an excuse for painting.

A painting trying not to be an excuse for a painting.

A painting trying not to be old.

A painting trying not to be silly.

A painting trying not to be yellow.

A painting trying not to be red.

A painting trying not to be blue.

A painting trying not to be black.

A painting trying not to be a window.

A painting trying not to be an object.

A painting trying not to be what it is.

A painting trying not to be what it is not.

A painting trying not to be sale-able.

A painting trying not to be art.

A painting trying not to be painting.

A painting trying not to be photography.

A painting trying not to be sculpture.

A painting trying not to be a pipe.

 

If you wish you could also stand up and read these ‘titles’ out aloud, like a performance.

Have fun.